Rebecca didn't insist anything. She said she wouldn't be able to attend and why. Her friend pouted like a school girl after she asserted herself. This is what black folks are talking about right now; the unrelenting societal expectation that they should just suck it up, and go along with this kind of behavior. Only AFTER Rebecca asserted herself did she become, as you say, binary. I don't blame her. This isn't about finessing nuance in relationship, this is about being DONE.

I'm a proponent for ending $hit that isn't working for you. And in that light, I'm ending this conversation. It'll be interesting to see if you can let someone else have the last word.